Quinta-feira, 25 de Outubro de 2007

Say What?: Wag The Dog

Winifred Ames: What did he do?
Stanley Motss: He raped a nun...
Winifred Ames: Oh, God. Oh, God. Jes - Oh, God!
Stanley Motss: And...
Winifred Ames: "And"? I don't want to know an "and". Why is there an "and"?
Stanley Motss: Look, look, look, look, look. He's fine as long as he gets his medication...
Winifred Ames: And if he doesn't get his medications?
Stanley Motss: He's not fine.

Wag the Dog (1997)

publicado por Holitzer às 20:06
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Quinta-feira, 11 de Outubro de 2007

Say What? "Borat: Cultural...

Borat: Who is this car that follow us? I wish it didn't follow us anymore.
Driving Instructor: Oh, I don't know.
Borat: Maybe we lose them.
Driving Instructor: No, we better not lose them.
Borat: [yelling at the passing car] Hey, don't look at me. Eat my tits!
Driving Instructor: All right. We'll make a right turn up here.
Borat: Don't look at me like that! I will eat your shit.
Driving Instructor: Hey, don't do that.
Borat: You fuck my mother.
Driving Instructor: Hey, hey. You can't do that.
Borat: No, he do before. He look on me.
Driving Instructor: You can't do that, okay? They're gonna throw us in jail, me with you. You can't...
Borat: Why in jail? He look on me- la-la-la behind.
Driving Instructor: You can't say that.

"Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan" (2006)

publicado por Holitzer às 16:42
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Terça-feira, 9 de Outubro de 2007

Sunset Cowboy: Say What? Meet The Parents

Late Night Courier: Gaylord M. Focker?
Greg Focker: That's me.
Jack Byrnes: I thought your name was Greg.
Greg Focker: It is.
Late Night Courier: That's not what it says here.
Greg Focker: Gaylord is my legal name. Nobody's called me by it since third grade.
Denny Byrnes: Wait a minute, so your name is Gay Focker?

Meet The Parents (2000)

publicado por Holitzer às 19:54
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Quarta-feira, 3 de Outubro de 2007

Top Gun ... Let the fun begin

Maverick: [spots Charlie for the first time] She's lost that loving feeling.

Goose: She's lo... [catches up]

Goose: No she hasn't.

Maverick: Yes she has.

Goose: [objecting] She's not lost that lo...

Maverick: Goose, she's lost it man. [walks off]

Goose: [to Mav] Come on! [to himself]

Goose: Aw sh... I hate it when she does that.


publicado por Holitzer às 02:06
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Sábado, 22 de Setembro de 2007

Say What?

Airplain (1980)

Roger Murdock: Flight 2-0-9'er, you are cleared for take-off.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh? Tower voice: L.A. departure frequency, 123 point 9'er.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Victor Basta: Request vector, over.
Captain Oveur: What? Tower voice: Flight 2-0-9'er cleared for vector 324.
Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.
Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor? Tower voice: Tower's radio clearance, over!
Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur. Over. Tower voice: Over.
Captain Oveur: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh? Tower voice: Roger, over!
Roger Murdock: What?
Captain Oveur: Huh?
Victor Basta: Who?

publicado por Holitzer às 00:32
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Sexta-feira, 14 de Setembro de 2007

This reminds me of a joke...

Desperado (1995)

Pick-up guy: This reminds me of a joke. This guy comes into a bar... walks to the bartender and says...” Bartender, I got a bet for you. I'll bet you $300 that I can piss... into that glass over there... and not spill a drop." The bartender looks at the glass. It's like 10 feet away. He says...”You're telling me you'll bet me $300... that you can piss, standing here... into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" Customer looks up and says: "That's right." Bartender says, "You've got a bet." The guy goes, "Okay, here we go." Pulls out his thing. He's thinking about the glass. He's thinking about the glass. Thinking about his dick. Dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass. Then he lets it rip. He pisses all over the place. He pisses on the bar. He pisses on the stools, on the floor, the phone. On the bartender! He's pissing everywhere EXCEPT the fucking glass! Bartender's laughing. He's $300 richer. He's like... piss dripping off his face. He says, "You fucking idiot, man! You got it in everything except the glass! You owe me $300... puta." Guy goes, "Excuse me just one little second." Goes in the back of the bar. There's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them. Comes back to the bar. Goes, "Here you go. $300." The bartender's like...”Why are you so happy? You just lost $300, idiot!" The guy says, "See those guys over there? I just bet them $500 APIECE... that I could piss on your bar... your floor, your phone, and piss on you... and not only would you not be mad about it... you'd be happy."

publicado por Holitzer às 23:01
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Terça-feira, 11 de Setembro de 2007

Brilhante argumentação :)


Capt. Ross: Corporal Barnes, I hold here the Marine Corps Outline for Recruit Training. You're familiar with this book?

Cpl. Barnes: Yes, sir.

Capt. Ross: You've read it?

Cpl. Barnes: Yes, sir.

Capt. Ross: Good. Would you open it up to the chapter that deals with code reds, please?

Cpl. Barnes: Sir?

Capt. Ross: Just flip open to the page of the book that talks about code reds.

Cpl. Barnes: Well, sir code red is a term that we use, I mean, just down at Gitmo, I really don't think that...

Capt. Ross: Ah, we're in luck then. Standard Operating Procedures, Rifle Security Company, Guantanamo Bay Cuba. Now I assume we'll find the term code red and its definition in that book. Am I right?

Cpl. Barnes: No sir.

Capt. Ross: Coporal Barnes, I'm a Marine. Is there no book. No pamphlet or manual, no regulation or set of written orders or instructions that lets me know that, as a Marine, one of my duties is to perform code reds?

Cpl. Barnes: No sir. No book, sir.

Capt. Ross: No further questions. [as Ross walks back to his table Kaffey takes the book out of his hand]

Kaffee: Corporal would you open this book up to the part that says that where the mess hall is. Cpl. Barnes: Well, Lt Kaffey, that's not in the book either, sir.

Kaffee: You mean to say the entire time you've been at Gitmo you've never had a meal?

Cpl. Barnes: No, sir. Three squares a day, sir.

Kaffee: Well, I don't understand. How did you know where the mess hall was if it wasn't in this book?

Cpl. Barnes: I guess I just followed the crowd at chow time, sir.

Kaffee: Thanks. No more questions.


publicado por Holitzer às 00:36
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Quinta-feira, 6 de Setembro de 2007

Say What? - Reservoir Dogs

A abertura de Reservoir Dogs (1992) de Quentin Tarantino, é sem dúvida uma das mais divertidas e, simultaneamente, estranhas que se têm visto.A cena: gangsters a tomar o pequeno-almoço, que nos filmes do género até a estreia de Reservoir Dogs, o tema da conversa seria o seu próximo golpe, ou a forma como o Tommy lixou o Jimmy que devia ter dado protecção ao Vinny...no entanto, Quentin Tarantino redigiu esta peróla para cena de abertura, em que ele próprio contracena como Mr.Brown:

Mr. Brown: Let me tell you what 'Like a Virgin' is about. It's all about a girl who digs a guy with a big dick. The entire song. It's a metaphor for big dicks.
Mr. Blonde: No, no. It's about a girl who is very vulnerable. She's been fucked over a few times. Then she meets some guy who's really sensitive...
Mr. Brown: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... Time out Greenbay. Tell that fucking bullshit to the tourists.
Joe: Toby... Who the fuck is Toby? Toby...
Mr. Brown: 'Like a Virgin' is not about this nice girl who meets a nice fella. That's what "True Blue" is about, now, granted, no argument about that.
Mr. Orange: Which one is 'True Blue'?
Nice Guy Eddie: 'True Blue' was a big ass hit for Madonna. I don't even follow this Tops In Pops shit, and I've at least heard of "True Blue".
Mr. Orange: Look, asshole, I didn't say I ain't heard of it. All I asked was how does it go? Excuse me for not being the world's biggest Madonna fan.
Mr. Orange: Personally, I can do without her.
Mr. Pink: I like her early stuff. You know, 'Lucky Star', 'Borderline' - but once she got into her 'Papa Don't Preach' phase, I don't know, I tuned out.
Mr. Brown: Hey, you guys are making me lose my... train of thought here. I was saying something, what was it?
Joe: Oh, Toby was this Chinese girl, what was her last name?
Mr. White: What's that?Joe: I found this old address book in a jacket I ain't worn in a coon's age. What was that name?Mr. Brown: What the fuck was I talking about?
Mr. Pink: You said 'True Blue' was about a nice girl, a sensitive girl who meets a nice guy, and that 'Like a Virgin' was a metaphor for big dicks.
Mr. Brown: Lemme tell you what 'Like a Virgin' is about. It's all about this cooze who's a regular fuck machine, I'm talking morning, day, night, afternoon, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick.Mr. Blue: How many dicks is that?
Mr. White: A lot.
Mr. Brown: Then one day she meets this John Holmes motherfucker and it's like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the 'Great Escape', he's digging tunnels. Now, she's gettin' the serious dick action and she's feeling something she ain't felt since forever. Pain. Pain.
Joe: Chew? Toby Chew?
Mr. Brown: It hurts her. It shouldn't hurt her, you know, her pussy should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks her it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time. You see the pain is reminding a fuck machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, 'Like a Virgin'.
Joe: Wong?

publicado por Holitzer às 21:55
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